halloween

and i have a love/hate relationship. or maybe i mean tomorrow.

either way, they always run together.

seems that every other year on the october 31st has just been the greatest.

then the others in-between, sometimes two in a row, have just been...awful.

like the gravel thing i talk about.

i really hope tomorrow has something for me.

i won't let it off the hook, if you really ignore this one.

two in a row...will not be cool.

 the hat i almost forgot.

i was a cowboy. girl. w/e. 

hannah was an indian. 

judyblue eyes

normal, black&white, texture.

normal, black&white, texture.

i'm in love with a stripper.

quick little diddy for ya.

one more thing in any which direction...

remember when i told you that... ^ 

well, it just happened.

COLORFUL BLOOD EVERYDAY EXPLODING HEAD

 COLORFUL BLOOD EVERYDAY EXPLODING HEAD 

COLORFUL BLOOD EVERYDAY EXPLODING HEAD 

COLORFUL BLOOD EVERYDAY EXPLODING HEAD 

COLORFUL BLOOD EVERYDAY EXPLODING HEAD 

you feel that, i rip back...

you feel bad? you feel sad?

"i'm sorry?" hell no fuck that!

it was my heart, 

it was my life, 

it was our start, 

it was your knife.
and these lungs have sung this song for too long,

and its true I hurt too, remember i loved you! 

i've, lost it all, fell today, 

it's all the same
i'm sorry oh, i'm sorry no.
i've, been abused, i feel so used, 

because of you
i'm sorry oh, i'm sorry no. 


the future that we both drew, 

and all the shit we've been through.

ahhh, remember when you sang me that song. 

terrible times. when it's bad, it's awful.

but when it's great, it's.....indescribable.

if you ain't runnin with it, run from it mother f....

title doesn't really go with the outfit.

huh. oh well.

i don't have a whole lot to say today, like i ever do. i mean i do, 

but, i feel i should constantly  censor  myself.

protect the minds. hahah.

i thank god that i am not basic.

i would like to say, weezy baby, you are a genius.

i can't get enough buddy.

&

i hope i'm invited to b dubs later. 

EATIN SHIT since 1975!

i like this guy. i don't know much about him, but a quick breeze through his prints and projects and he likes mt. dew., he did the green label art thing. who won that anyway? do we have a winner yet? besides mt dew. he's gotta lotta sketches of decks. if you click on his sketch page. that's how my brain feels alot. i think this guy gets me. yep, i like this guy.

this is what i feel like right now.
one more thing in any which direction and this is gonna be all over your floor buddy.

the blog title came from a spot on his big sketch page.

you're my source of most frustrations

oh it was from blink 182....
nah nah nah nah nah nah nah, i just forgot you were there.
and he said, nah nah nah nah nah, i just forgot you were there.


i guess it was good to be so sick i couldn't think straight. 
i didn't really want to dwell on you for every second.
who wants to dwell on any type of thing for every second.
my health is coming back however and guess what is left, 
a whole two and half days missed of probable dwelling time.
you're so spoiled baby.


i haven't gotten a good look at you in over a year and two hard months.
you'd think i'd forget certain things, your mannerism's.
our stuff, our words, our songs.
blah, blah, blah. i haven't forgotten much of anything.
you make me nervous, so i really can't eat.




i'm not sure what you should get out of this.
a lot of dwelling and whining.
confusion, frustration?
i know it all. 
a big sigh, i woke up from my nap with a big sigh.
blink 182 was playing, you know, our stuff.
and he said, nah nah nah nah nah nah nah, i just forgot you were there.
my heart jumped into my throat...it's still there. 
you've got to come pry it down.

lovely ashley williams

back in spear, last year, around this time.

cracker

plastered walls

i vow,
          to be ever so sweet, patiently waiting.

taken fall of last year.

it's hard to be home.

it's so hard to be home sometimes.

i feel two different pulls... inside me. 

always. but when i go from place to place...a pull get's stronger; thee other, weaker.

sometimes they change and engulf each other. twist about and switch to the background, the forefront... if one becomes too much, completely taking over the other, it makes too more pulls. a cycle...almost. that never really ends.

like waves. just crashing around everything that touches my life. i don't think i could control them. 

even if i wanted too, i don't know if i would. 

sure the feelings can be the lowest hell has to offer. but they've been the purest. simplest..complex, brightest, great, great feeling, ever.. stuff you can just breathe on. breathe in. be in. just has it all. but they wouldn't be one without the other. just like the pull wouldn't be one without the other. just like i wouldn't be me without you.

anyway, i thought, maybe if you ever found this, you'd want to know. and you'd want to know me some more. because i haven't changed a whole lot.  
i didn't want to grow without you. 
so you still know me. like you did. i haven't become something i'm not. and i haven't become something you don't know. i'm still what you know.
i thought, maybe if you ever found this, you'd want to know that one pull always seems to be you.

octagonal romanerio ed-niro golden house

somethin's cookin in the bathroom.

shooting an end of august wedding.

it stresses me out, weddings. i'm not sure if they're my niche.

i'm sure the bride/groom/family's wouldn't like to hear that.

i put in my 110 percent. but preference, not sure if wedding is the way to go.

actually i am sure, i'd only do it for my enjoyment, preferably not hired. 
just there. just on location.

then you can purchase any images you'd like. 

please stay, until i'm gone.

i'm going to make a picture book. 

i can't decide what it should have in it.

 this kinda thing...

or....

this kinda thing.

i just dunno.

i think thoughts that i know are bad.

make it go away.

one.

two.

three.

four.

....seven.

eight.

i tell the kids that it's all okay, 

but why don't you just make it go away.